{"id":227,"date":"2009-07-01T23:24:02","date_gmt":"2009-07-02T06:24:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/reallifesuperheroes.org\/wordpress\/?p=27"},"modified":"2009-07-01T23:24:02","modified_gmt":"2009-07-02T06:24:02","slug":"hero-complex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/2009\/07\/01\/hero-complex\/","title":{"rendered":"Hero Complex"},"content":{"rendered":"

July 2009- FHM Magazine<\/a>
\nFHM page 02<\/a>
\nFHM page 03<\/a>
\nFHM Page 04<\/a>
\nFHM page 05<\/a>
\nPhotography by Tim Knox
\nWritten by Josh Woodfin
\nIs it a bird? Is it a plane? Sort of: It\u2019s FHM\u2019s Josh Woodfin, who joined New York\u2019s real-life superheroes to battle street crime. While dressed a bit like a parrot\u2026
\nMay 2009, 10 pm, in New York\u2019s Washington Square Pare. A 6ft 8in, 20st drug dealer steams towards me bellowing, \u201cMess up my world and I will FUCK! UP! YOURS!\u201d As I spin on my heels, I hear a tearing sound. I\u2019ve split my purple cat suit, the final indignity. The 15-strong group of hollering dealers continue to bear down on me. Then: salvation. At my flank, back-up appears in the form of three real-life superheroes: \u2018Dark Guardian\u2019, \u2018Z\u2019 and \u2018Deaths Head Moth\u2019. They swooped down to face and enemy with superior numbers and probably firepower.
\nUnbowed, unashamed and unafraid, the heroes advance. Now stood behind my vantage point- a low brush- I see Dark Guardian, in all honesty, a not-very-tall man, standing motionless in front of the behemoth shaking his head. Whatever the beast is saying, Dark Guardian disagrees. The air is thick with the possibility of violence. But is this a battle the heroes can win? And, move importantly, can everyone see the shape of my cock though these tights?
\nOrigins
\nI can\u2019t remember the exact point I lost faith in humanity, but I can certainly narrow it down. When I was 15, I got dumped on Valentines Day. I was so shocked I vomited on my own shoes. Then there was the time I saw a main in a park kick his dog so hard it died. Now, perhaps because of both incidents, I look at events such as the G20 protest and think, \u201cWhy bother? There\u2019s nothing we can do\u2026\u201d
\nThen a certain You Tube video caught my eye. It was a US news report about a real-life masked 210year-old superhero called \u2018Shadow Hare\u2019, who walks the streets of Cincinnati handing out food, fighting crime and bringing justice while wearing a sort-of Mexican wrestling mask. Something about these altruistic acts nagged at me. Why was he doing this? I had to find out more.
\nA quick Google search revealed a huge internet community of \u201cReals\u201d or Real-Life Superheroes all dedicated to the cause. Reallifesuperheroes.org lists over 30 active heroes, most of whom are located in America.
\nI copy in all the heroes\u2019 e-mail addresses and attempted to make contact. The response is overwhelming, and bizarre. \u201cI WOULD LOVE TO BE SQUEEGEEINTERVIEWED!!!!!!!\u201d replies \u2018Squeegeeman\u2019, \u201cHAVE A SQUEEGEETASTIC DAY!!!!!!!\u201d
\nThen \u2018Dark Guardian\u2019 (or, by day, Chris Pollak) e-mails, saying that , although he\u2019s been burnt before, he\u2019d be happy to get us in touch with a good group of Real in New York, \u201cThis isn\u2019t a comic book or movie, though,\u201d he warns. \u201cWe\u2019ve had guns flashed at us. So I won\u2019t go on patrol without another hero, \u2018Deaths Head Moth\u2019,\u201d That may just be a collection of nouns, but it still sounds badass. I need a costume. I plan to choose something in the aristocratic mould of The League of Extraordinary Gentleman or The Shadow, says, from a nearby fancy dress shop. I end up leaving a deposit for a flamboyant uniform that makes me look like I\u2019ve collapsed into a gay pride flag. I make the final arrangements to meet Dark Guardian, board the plane to New York and prepare to fight with them side-by-side, cape-to-cape.
\nFortress of solitude
\nI join my mentors for the mission in a blustery car part in Staten Island, the least populated of New York\u2019s five boroughs. Dark Guardian is an unassuming, softly spoken young man of 25, with gel-spiked hair, a pronounced nose and a wiry build from hours of training. We\u2019re convened at Constanzo\u2019s Marital Arts, a gym where he\u2019s an instructor in all kinds of fighting styles, from kickboxing to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
\nStanding slightly behind Dark Guardian is a short, barrel-chested man in a NY Yankees hat, a grey T-shirt tucked into his heavy cargo trousers and big, steel-toe capped boots. I offer him my hand and say with a falter in my voice, \u201cDeaths Head Moth?\u201d
\nNice to meet you,\u201d he replies. I\u2019m not offered another name. Behind him stands a taller, harder looking man sporting a grown-out Mohawk and arms dotted with tattoos. This is \u2018Z\u2019, a hero I wasn\u2019t expecting.
\n\u201cOkay\u2026\u201d interrupts Dark Guardian. \u201cShall we train?\u201d They visibly perk up.
\nDisturbing backstories
\nFive minutes later we\u2019re getting suited up. Dark Guardian sports red and black biker leathers and Asics trainers. Practical, not showy, but with an air of authority. He\u2019s been a superhero for six years, doing everything from neighborhood patrols to working with the homeless. Deaths Head Moth, on the other hand, is more tech. He sports a one-piece black suit that zips over his head, his logo emblazed on his chest \u2013 a white skull with tow baseball bats crossed like swords underneath. Under his suit he also wears a set of butcher\u2019s chain mail, (\u201cIt\u2019s light and will stop most blades\u201d). I ask what\u2019s in his utility belt. \u201cEverything,\u201d he smiles. :\u201d A knife, bear mace and these\u2026\u201d He deftly swivels tow batons. AS they spin, I spot something else.
\n\u201cThey\u2019re mothrangs,\u201d You mean ninja stars? \u201cEssentially, yes. I had them custom made.\u201d Deaths Head Moth estimates he\u2019s spent over $5,000 on his equipment. He hands a moth rang over; it\u2019s razor sharp. I ask if they\u2019re legal. \u201cThey are in Virginia, not in New York.\u201d
\nBut it\u2019s Z\u2019s mask that disturbs me most. A tight black hood, with large eyeholes held together by safety pins, it\u2019s scary\/. \u201cIt\u2019s meant to be. Some of the things I do- hunting pedophiles and rapist \u2013 it\u2019s not strictly legal. Incidentally, you want to see something coo? These are my blast knuckles. \u201cHe holds up what looks like a set of plastic knuckledusters. He grips hard as a spark cracks into life. \u201cHit someone with these, and you give\u2019em a 950-000-volt shock. It floods their body with lactic acid. That\u2019ll put most people down\u201d
\nOnce I\u2019m dressed and looking like a particularly fey parrot, the true difference between the heroes become apparent. Dark Guardian is disciplined, methodical and a skilled fighter. Deaths Head Moth looks like one of those tough little doges you see on council estates; loyal and definitely not to be fucked with. Z, however, is and old school brawler. \u201cI grew up around bikers, \u201cHe says, \u201cSo you fought with whatever you had to hand. Chairs, pool cues\u2026\u201d
\nZ also tells me that he wants to \u201cmake a difference\u201d, like the rest of the heroes, but I can\u2019t help but think he\u2019s partly motivated by vengeance. \u201cI started after my suicide attempt.\u201d he admits. \u201cI was angry, running round the city tearing shit up. Then I realized that I could do some good. It sounds stupid but I am Z now. The mask gives me an excuse to be strong. If you can walk through the streets like this, you can do anything,\u201d
\nThe heroes then begin to undress, I assume because they don\u2019t want to travel in their uniforms. Then I realize tit\u2019s for another reason. \u201cYou wearing your vest?\u201d ask Z. \u201cThere\u2019s just three of us tonight, of course I am,\u201d replies Dark Guardian. I watch in silence as they strap on bulletproof vest, then I look down at the gold tassels and purple spandex of my uniform, a single hair poking though the material at my belly. Never mind a bullet, I can\u2019t even stop a hair\u2026
\nEvil nemeses
\nAs we all pile into Dark Guardian\u2019s Mazda, the atmosphere is dark. The only talk is of the game plan for tonight. I ask if they\u2019d run if someone pulled a gun and I\u2019m shocked by Dark Guardian\u2019s answer. \u201cYeah I\u2019d run. But they they\u2019d be a marked man. I\u2019d know they were a physical offender, so I\u2019d know they were a physical offender, so I\u2019d go back. And fuck them up.\u201d
\nWhat do the police thing of you?
\n\u201cI actually got taken down to the precinct on the last patrol. They wanted to talk. It was weird, everyone there knows who I was and they were really supportive. They were concerned for my safety. But I\u2019m not going to stop. I can\u2019t stop.\u201d
\nAs we near Washington Square Park where the patrol will take place, the car falls silent. The air is heavy with the expectation of violence and the fug of too many grown men wearing skintight synthetic fabrics. Dark Guardian flicks though the radio. Stations after station of overblown American rock music. Then, the next station is playing Strawberry Fields Forever by the Beatles, \u201cThis\u2019ll work,\u201d says Deaths Head Moth through his mask. He hums along.
\nFor a moment, my fear of getting shot abates and I suffer from that old familiar felling of physical embarrassment. I\u2019m about to get out of the care and I look like a hernia.\u00a0 But the gun fear returns. I point out a sign saying \u2018No Stopping\u2019. \u201cNot a problem,\u201d says Dark Guardian \u2013 he has a Secret Service badge he got from a friend to put in the cr.
\nAs we walk along, we\u2019re barely noticed, apart from one courier who nearly rides into a parked Fed Ex truck. Entering though the North East corner of the park we walk past an annoying, but technically law-abiding, samba band. Then a series of loud whistles echo through the part; it\u2019s the dealers signaling like sportswear-clad meerkats that something is amiss. They\u2019ve had dealings with these heroes before. Two weeks ago Dark Guardian, Deaths Head Moth and a host of others successfully, if only temporarily, booted them from the park.
\nWhen we reach the South West corner, however, were clearly outnumbered. The dealers perched on part benches like crows. I\u2019m scared. I feel massively out of my element and far from my comfortable existence back in London. AS I walk past one dealer, he mutters, \u201cYou better have a badge if you\u2019re gonna come up in here.\u201d I have no idea what to do, so I just say \u201csorry\u201d\/ I then stand at the back behind Dark Guardian, Z perching on the top rail of a fence with Deaths Heads Moth stood to the side. They\u2019re in attack formation when a gigantic drug dealer \u2013 I call him \u2018Gigantor\u2019 in my nightmares \u2013 comes streaming over. \u201cWho the fuck are you! Why you gotta fuck up my world?\u201d Dark Guardian replies coolly: \u201cYou have to leave. This part isn\u2019t for you.\u201d More dealers approach and I\u2019m really shitting it. Bu the heroes stand their ground. It\u2019s a surreal sight, three men, essentially in fancy dress, facing down at least 15 very scary drug dealers.
\nI\u2019m also ashamed to say I was backing away at this point. The photographer and I liter at the edge of the part, where I quickly discover it\u2019s hard to be inconspicuous when you\u2019re wearing a scarlet cape. A group of the dealers start hollering at Deaths Head Moth. \u201cTake your mask off! If you\u2019re so brave, take your mask off.\u201d
\nDeaths Head Moth unzips his mask and reveals his face.
\n\u201cWoah, put it back on!\u201d shots one of the dealers; and unfair end to a brave act. It\u2019s getting pretty heavy. NO one\u2019s made a move but the dealers are getting agitated \u2013 we\u2019re costing them money. And anyone will tell you that\u2019s a bad idea. Like pushing down on the very tip of a cat\u2019s tail while it\u2019s trying to cat, only loads more dangerous.
\nOne of the dealers flashes something at Dark Guardian and he visibly tenses, then leans in to talk to the guy. Dark Guardian signals to Deaths Head Moth and Z. They start walking backwards towards me, not showing their backs to the dealers.
\n\u201cYou ain\u2019t no fuckin\u2019 heroes, man, \u201c shouts one dealer, causing Dark Guardian to stop in his tracks for a moment. I watch his knuckles bunch. If the light was better I\u2019m sure I\u2019d see them turning white, but he keeps walking.
\n\u201cWe have to go,\u201d Dark Guardian stays without meeting my eyes. We start walking down the street and some of the dealers follow.
\n\u201cWalk up front,\u201c says Z, and me and the photographer skitter off like little girls. I catch a passing lady glancing at my mammal toe (male camel toe), before looking away quickly, unimpressed. The same dealer that spoke to Dark Guardian before we started retreating comes out of nowhere. I prepare myself to use the photographers as a human shield.
\nBut we\u2019re safe, the dealer is an undercover cop. \u201cI appreciated what you guys are trying to do,\u201d he says breathlessly. \u201cBut you can\u2019t fuck around with these guys.\u201d
\n\u201cWe\u2019re not fucking around,\u201d says Z.
\nThe cop looks tired for a moment then says, \u201cJust be safe,\u201d before running off.
\nIt wasn\u2019t said in a school safety lecture way, it was said with respect.
\nA new hero is born
\nAs we climb back into the car, the mood is charged with frustration. Dark Guardian\u2019s soft American accent has been replaced with a pissed-off New York Accent.
\n\u201cThat mudderfucker. I\u2019m gonna get that big mudderfucker. I had my torch ready to smack him in the fucking throat if he made a move.\u201d
\nI tentatively ask why he had to leave.
\nThere was too many of them,\u201d snaps the Dark Guardian. \u201cWe\u2019re not stupid. We nailed them last time, and this time they were ready.\u201d
\nI\u2019m beginning to feel their frustration. They don\u2019t want much, just to make their small corner of the world a little better. Suddenly it feels like the wrong time to tell them that my cape is caught in the door and I\u2019m worried about losing my deposit.
\nWhen relaying what their ultimate goal is, Dark Guardian gets s even more animated.\u201d We\u2019re gonna fight back. I\u2019m going to train more heroes up and we\u2019re going to reclaim the part. We\u2019re not better than the cops but\u2026\u201d Z interrupts \u201cWe can do things that people caught up in the red tape can\u2019t.\u201d
\nThe car falls silent as we race though Times Square just as a thunder storm breaks over the city. I ask what everyone is thinking about. \u201cI\u2019m thinking about how we\u2019re going to get them next time,\u201d says Dark Guardian ominously.
\n\u201cI\u2019m thinking I need a piss,\u201d says Z.
\nAs they drop me at my hotel, we shake hands and I press again about what will happen next. Dark Guardian has calmed down a little. \u201cWe lost that battle, but this is a war and we will win it.\u201d I asked Deaths Head Moth why he took his masked off. \u201cI wanted to show them I wasn\u2019t afraid,\u201d he says, looking at his mask for a moment. \u201cIn hindsight, that was when I lost the psychological advantage.\u201d
\nAfter our goodbyes, I sit on the edge of my hotel bed, unwilling to take off my uniform. Dark Guardian has a vision that can only be good; whether he achieves it is irrelevant. I\u2019m just glad he\u2019s trying. Deaths Head Moth and Z are on more personal journeys \u2013 I worry a day will come with they can\u2019t separate themselves from their characters.
\nZ, though, has the potential to become something truly great, if he can just hold it together. But I\u2019m concerned it will end badly for him, whether that means prison for going to heavy on someone, or worse \u2013 death. I walk over to my 11th-floor window, still in my uniform and open it wide to listen to the city. \u201cBe safe,\u201d I whisper to the night. \u201cBe safe.\u201d It\u2019s at that point that I spot a young boy staring at me open mouth from the opposite window. I wink, flash him a thumbs up and disappear out of sight. \u2018The Bird of Paradise\u2019 has taken flight. FHM
\nHolding out for hero?
\nSome of the hero community\u2019s more \u2018colorful\u2019 members\u2026
\nThe Eye
\nCrime fighter
\nIdentity: Semi-Public
\nRegion: California
\nHe says: \u201cI have over the years developed two of my own fighting styles. One is my own \u2018Jeet Kune Do\u2019 of sorts, called \u2018Jade Mantis\u2019, the other being a street wise, basic self-defense method called \u2018Leaf Hand\u2019. The quest for justice is an eternal path.\u201d
\nAnax
\nCrime fighter
\nIdentity: Secret
\nRegion: Ohio\/Pennsylvania
\nHe says: \u201cWe live in a world full of hatred, pain and suffering. Truth, Justice and the American Way are for sale to the highest bidder. Corruption and incompetence affect every aspect of our lives. Some call me a crimefighter. Some call me delusional and misguided. Some call me a real-life superhero. Some call me a menace to society. Some call me a ninja.\u201d
\nMaster Legend
\nCrime fighter
\nIdentity: Secret
\nRegion: Florida
\nHe says: \u201cI am a real-life superhero. I am a trained battle-fighting machine. I am a master of martial and metaphysical arts. I put my life on the line like its worthless\u2026 maybe it is but I will destroy evil forever. I will help all those I can to the best of my abilities but we warned: I am resentful and a superhero of vengeance. Don\u2019t tread on me!\u201d
\nRed Arrow
\nHumanitarian
\nIdentity: Secret
\nRegion: Hong Kong
\nHe says: \u201cI try to bring happiness to people and become the salt and light of the world.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

July 2009- FHM Magazine FHM page 02 FHM page 03 FHM Page 04 FHM page 05 Photography by Tim Knox Written by Josh Woodfin Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Sort of: It\u2019s FHM\u2019s Josh Woodfin, who joined New York\u2019s real-life superheroes to battle street crime. While dressed a bit like a parrot\u2026 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[8],"tags":[377,516,533,690,718,912,1840,2181,2376,2680,3013],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/227"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=227"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/227\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=227"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=227"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.rlsh.net\/archive\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=227"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}